A mommy "no no"

So our youngest started Cubbies this year at Awana. All of the other kids looked forward to saying their verses and did it with no problem. Well, the little one decided that she didn't want to say her verses until she was four. She has always been on the shy side, so I just decided to go with it and I didn't want to push her. All year she has not said a word to anyone, not even if she needed anything. The volunteers there still think that she can't talk and that I am making it up. Seriously, I am not sure why she can't actually do that at our house someday??? Anyway, last weekend she turned 4! Yeah, we have been building up for a week, "You get to say your verse at Cubbies!!! Yeah, they will be so excited!!!" So, yesterday we went over the verses at lunch. She looked at me and said, "I am not going to say my verse." Promises. They are a big thing to me and I have been telling her that she promised them that she would start saying her verses to them when she turned four. So, I wanted her to realize that when she promises something, she needs to do it. So, she starts bawling. Tears streaming. Alligator tears. I took her in my lap and calmly told her that I knew it would be hard, but she has been saying all year that this is when she was going to do it.

THEN I DID IT, THE MOMMY NO, NO!

I told her that since she promised that could not leave that night until she said the verse. Yep, I did. I SHOULDN'T HAVE! Once the words crossed my lips, I knew I shouldn't have said it.

I dropped the kids off at Awana, the little one insisted that I drop the older ones off first. Nervous, I understood and did so. Then we headed to her room. Her leader was happened to be waiting right by the door. LIPS PIERCED. I smiled and said to the leader, "This is your lucky week, she turned four last weekend and so you get to hear her say her verse tonight." She looked at me with big eyes PLEADING. You said it, you need to make her do it was all I could think. I had to go. I help out with the community youth at our church while the kids are at Awana. I couldn't stay. I left her with the leader, PRAYING SHE WOULD DO IT! I came back, was running late, and there I saw here. Her leader was heading out the door. She participated in gym, but I have still not heard her speak. THUMP went my heart. NO! I couldn't leave the room with her.

I HAD TOLD HER SHE COULDN'T LEAVE. THE MOMMY NO,NO!

The other teacher from the other room brought my other kids in. We sat waiting. I told the other teachers to go. We were not going to leave until she said her verse, even if it was just to me. The halls were clear. Just me and my kids in an empty classroom. 9:00pm hit. Still no verse. Then I started thinking, is this right to sit here and MAKE her say a verse. Yes, this is where the will is won. Right? I had to keep telling myself I was doing the right thing. I mean now it was just our family and she STILL was not saying it. She cried. I told her that was not going to get her out of it. 9:10 pm. The kids were getting restless, my husband probably thought I had gotten into a car accident. I couldn't go. People were wanting to lock up the church. Car. I would sit in the car. Come on, was all I could think. Just say it!!! I had to inforce other disciplines. Finally, around 9:15pm. The words, through the tears, came out and she finally said the FOUR words I had been waiting to hear, "Lord, teach us to pray." That was it. That was all I had wanted her to say. Well, He had taught me in those LONG minutes. It was FINALLY time to go home.